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Data From Arranged Marriage Survey

This version was saved 10 years, 8 months ago View current version     Page history
Saved by cbennett
on June 9, 2013 at 9:01:19 pm



Your Comments:

My other Ican trust with many other things

My parents are incompetent morons

I wouldn't trust my parents to choose a spouse because my dad doesn't understand girls and my mom would get shouted down by him if she didn't agree with him or accuse her of not wanting me to be happy when the guy that he chooses most likely won't make me happy.

No, because even if I don't have experience I can make the person not like me if I don't like them after a while. Also I can stand up for myself!

They don't know me as well as they think they do.

I do not trust my parents to choose a spouse for me because they would choose somebody with traits that they like but not necessarily what i like.

i trust them because I have lived with them for 14 years and I have trusted them with my life.

I feel like as well as my parents know me, it wouldn't be right if they chose my husband for me because they don't know ALL the things i would look for in a husband. They also would probably look for someone who has a lot of money and who seems nice where id look for other traits like someone who is caring and romantic and it wouldn't matter to me what his financial status is. That's why i think my parents SHOULD NOT  chose my husband for me.

No, because I think they may not share the same idea of what I would want my spouse to be like with me.

I don't trust my dad but i trust my mom. We have our differences but She knows my likes and dislikes very well and I know that she wouldn't toucher me with a horrible husband. Shes met my boyfriends and she knows my pet peeves. I don't trust my dad because He's not really in my life anymore and doesn't know me that well. 

I trust my parents to choose my spouse because I know that they would choose somebody that is right for me. Somebody that is respectful, kind, caring, would help around the house, has a good job and can support a family, likes me for who I am, has good hygiene and dresses nice and isn't a slob. My parents wouldn't look for somebody that they like and I wouldn't, they would find somebody that is right for me that they also like and think is a nice person to be with and spend the rest of my life with. I can trust that my parents would find the perfect husband for me. 

We have different ideas about what to look for in a spouce

We both have different opinions about people and what we see in them. They can like the person I'm in love with but they can't feel what I feel, they have to see it on my face and what he means to me. Then they see that I'm happy. Also they just want me to be happy.

My dad doesn't know what kind of person I'm interested in. He would pick someone he wants me to marry, not someone that I would like to.

He might be ugly and not be who they think he is.

They usually don't agree with me. They would probably find someone I hate for me to marry just to get me mad. 

"I dont because i feel like they would pick someone totally out there, that i wont like and will be to polite and not bad enough for me

because I think this is a decision that could affect the rest ofyour life.

My parents know who I am, and I think they would pick out a good spoucse for me to date. 

Because they think that they know what i want in a spouse but they really dont.

because they think that they know me but they dont know what i want in a girl.

My parents have known me my whole life. 

I don't think that anyone could pick someone for you to love. It's more special to find them yourself. 

I don't really tell my mom about what I tend to like in a guy, so I wouldn't expect her to know what I really like or what in a guy. If she knew more about what I was interested in or wanted, then I would probably be more willing to think she'd pick a better match for me.

My dad would just pick some ugly chunky girl that has no manners.

I trust my parent because she know me and she wil choose whats best for me.

They do not know everything about me so they could choose someone who i did not like.

because they are understanding

They know who good people are

Because they would probably choose the exact oppisite person i would like to marry

No because I don't think I would like the guy, I mean I may like someone else other than him and I want to be free to make my own choices

My mom is crazy!

No, because my parents don't know everything that i like and they also don't know what i want in a spouse. Also if i don't like who my parents choose i would feel bad telling them i don't their choice and etc. 






Parent Comments:

Can you explain why or why not?

This is such an individual choice and I could not possibly in good faith ever choose a spouse for my child.  Only they know what it is exactly that they want in a spouse.

I could not choose my child's spouse for them because love and compatibility are also important factors along with many of the good traits listed above. I would want to have my child choose the person that that they would want to spend the rest of their life with after they have gotten to know that person very well over several years, where they get to see them through good times, tragic times and indifferent times to truly get to know them before getting married. 

The objectives just chosen were met.

I don't feel a spouse can be chosen by anyone other than the person who is looking for one.  There needs to be a connection there and only the two people involved in the relationship can tell if there is that connection.

What we consider important at our age isn't the same thing that is going to make our daughter fall in love. We would be looking for someone that is kind and considerate and could make her happy or at least we thought could make her happy.

It is a personal choice that is intangible. I know someone who has an arranged marriage and it works, but both parties have to be willing.

Although I know my daughter well, it would be difficult for me to choose a  spouse for her.  I would want her to be able to decide on her own.  God gives us free will, and these decisions play into this issue, as well.

No one knows my child better than I do!

I know her inherent traits, and what truly makes her happy in  both the short and long term.  I have the advantage of  seeing her grow independently as well as how she grows with and away from her previous partners. 

not my place to do that.

Because nobody can pick Mr, or Mrs right for somebody else. Everyone is different.

I think I know my child or at least would hope that I do. We have simular likes and dislikes and would be able to choice someone who would be best suited for my child.

Because I think a mother knows her children better than they know themselves and has the wisdom and experience behind her to prevent their future mistakes.

My child should be able to choose any spouse they want.

I would like to make sure that they were trustworthy, faithful, honest, hardworking, and good enough for my daughter. 

I think that _____ trusts our judgments as parents. 

It could certainly be a possibility, yet in our culture other problems might arise.

I would want ______ to find someone that he connected with and makes him happy.  He needs love, care for, and cherish that person for them not because I tell him to. 

Everyone needs to decide for themselve what they are looking for in a spouse

No i cant

I think I know my daughter well enough to know what kind of spouse she is looking  for.

I would love to guide her to make a decision based on what I value to be important but ultimately she will have to learn on her own what is important to her and hopefully her heart will follow.

I think that the two people have to have chemistry and that is not something that can be arranged by someone else.

"I don't think I could successfully choose a spouse for my son.

I feel that even if I selected all the characteristics of someone who would be an ideal match, ______would still need to have feelings and a connection for that person."

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